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The Results From The Grammys Are In!


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THE RESULTS ARE IN: Kendrick Lamar is amazing and pretty much everything else is bad (except for Lady Gaga’s keyboard stand, a highlight of the evening). Diplo won twice and a lot of people thought that anything to do with Bruno Mars was the Best Thing in the year. Adele “messed up” her performance but it could have sounded kind of sick in a Throbbing Gristle sort of way if she’d really gone nuts. I have some knives and a balaclava you can use, Adele. Take it to another level, this is The Grammys we’re talking about.

Nobody appeared to know anything about metal, or at least not the good kind I write the names of on my backpack. There’s definitely more than a dozen religious brands around but only one represented at the Grammys (Best UFO Truth Party Slogan Chanted Loudly still not eligible due to corrupt laws of man). It’s fun to watch the television but it’s even more fun when there’s something else on. The Grammys.